Big rewards from Big Buddy mentoring

The egg and spoon race is a popular part of the annual Big Buddy Day Out, held in summer.


Big Buddy mentoring works on the simple philosophy that boys need good male role models in their lives to become good men.

For lots of reasons, many boys in New Zealand don’t have a father and while mothers do a courageous job raising boys alone, they can’t model maleness. And above all else, boys learn through modelling.

It starts out with a boy who has lost his father, either through death or estrangement. Mum (or a caregiver) does her best to raise her boy but senses something is missing – a good man who can ‘do’ stuff with her boy. If there aren’t any men in her family to fulfil this role and she doesn’t want to choose a partner based on this need, she can reach out to Big Buddy.

Since 1997, this secular social agency has carefully screened and matched more than 600 volunteer men in the Auckland and Wellington regions with fatherless boys aged seven to 14. In North Auckland, Big Buddy has made 66 matches and has 21 Little Buddies waiting for a mentor. There are currently 17 Big Buddies going through the screening process in North Auckland.

Big Buddy mentors spend at least two to three hours a week with their Little Buddies, doing whatever they both enjoy – usually simple stuff like walking on beaches, throwing a ball around, making things and visiting places. The important thing is that the Big Buddy shows up regularly in the boy’s life and takes a real interest in him.

The aim is for fatherless boys to know there is a man they can rely on to show up, listen and have fun with. In the end, it’s a simple act of human caring that makes a profound difference in a fatherless boy’s life.

The statistics on positive mentoring are clear and compelling: having a Big Buddy mentor increases a boy’s self-esteem; improves his relationships, helps him do better in school, means he’ll be less likely to get into trouble and improves his employment options.

Big Buddy chief executive Richard Aston says there is always a need for volunteer mentors and of course, funds.
“All it takes is a good man with a big heart and the rewards of being a Big Buddy are huge. In fact sometimes the mentors reckon they have as much, if not more, fun than the boys. I guess it’s about being able to try new things and just experience the world from a young boy’s perspective.”

Richard says the programme has proved itself over time. “It’s a great feeling when we get young men that we met when they were about seven years old, come to us wanting to volunteer. We see a lot of second generations now putting their hands up to be mentors, and that’s how we know there’s value in what we’re doing.” contributed

Info: bigbuddy.org.nz or look for Big Buddy on Facebook.