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Margaret Willoughby has heard the words ‘I Do’ more times than most, having married more than a hundred couples on the Hibiscus Coast. As well as spending more than a decade as a marriage celebrant, the long-time Silverdale resident has a passionate interest in natural health. This has spilled over into work in the health sector, where she has become a vital cog in community health, liaising with local organisations and helping to feedback their concerns to the District Health Board. Margaret spoke to Terry Moore about her first year as coordinator for Rodney Health Link and her life on the Coast.
My husband Vivian and I moved to Whangaparaoa when we were newly married. In those days the first thing you did as a married couple was buy a section and build a house, so we were looking for somewhere to settle down. Vivian was a motor mechanic and a friend of his encouraged him to come to Whangaparaoa to work. He found a job in Silverdale and we moved here soon after. Tom Moffat was subdividing his land for sections at the time and we bought one and built our home. We’ve lived here now for 45 years.
We had a family of four children, three girls and a boy, so I was a full time mum for quite some time. My husband decided he’d had enough of being a mechanic and so we started a commercial cleaning business together. It wasn’t long before he figured there must be a better way to clean windows than using a shammy and rag, so he invented a hand-pump method called Waterflow Window Cleaner, which he won an award for. We sold that business as it involved long hours for six days a week and we were pretty tired of having that sort of commitment.
After a short stint overseas, I took a job with the credit department of Farmers Trading Company in Hobson Street. I had to commute from Silverdale into Auckland every day, long before the motorway was built, and the drive could take anywhere from an hour to two hours. The traffic was nothing like it is now. I was there for 20 years and ended up in senior management by the time I resigned in 1996. The credit department of Farmers was huge, as they were the first company to offer their customers credit and it was very popular. In the early days they didn’t have a plastic card like you get now – just a cardboard one. It was long before credit cards like Visa came along. Part of my job was to go out in the community and run credit workshops and that’s where I first had the idea of becoming a marriage celebrant. I found I was comfortable speaking in front of a group, and really enjoyed meeting people from all walks of life and helping them.
Eleven years ago I applied to be a celebrant and was accepted straight away – I’ve been doing it ever since. One criteria for acceptance as a celebrant is whether you can fill a need in your local community, so I think that was one reason I was selected. I built up my celebrant business gradually, mainly by word of mouth. You need to gain the couple’s trust, and have empathy for people and their feelings. The service is the easy bit – it’s the preparation that’s the key, because that’s when you get to know the couple and their families. There’s been a definite swing back towards getting married in the last 2–3 years, and I’m as busy with weddings as I’ve ever been. Beaches and regional parks are the most popular venues for Hibiscus Coast couples, as well as family homes and gardens.
After leaving Farmers I worked selling advertising locally, but I wasn’t one of those high-powered sales reps. I was more interested in helping local people to promote and build their businesses. There has been big growth in Whangaparaoa for business, especially in areas like Karepiro Drive, but also for small, home-based businesses as well. Last year I saw an advertisement for a coordinator for Rodney Health Link and thought ‘that sounds like me’. It involves liaising with the Waitemata District Health Board (WDHB) and community health groups, so I get to meet a wide variety of people and travel all over Rodney. Wellsford and Helensville are among my favourite places to go because those communities are a long distance from hospital services, yet have the same need for health care as in an urban area so there are some big issues there.
On the Hibiscus Coast, I think two big concerns are the provision of after-hours care and respite care for people in the 18–55 year age group. After hours care is currently top of the list of priorities for the WDHB so I hope something positive will happen there soon. Respite care for older people is pretty well catered for here, but younger ones fall through the cracks. Caregivers for this group, who are often family members, need assistance as well, so they can have breaks and some kind of support. It has been a revelation to me, having not had much to do with this sector before, how much wonderful work community groups do. I find it quite humbling when I meet volunteers for groups such as the Community House in Orewa, Teenadders, Parent Aid, Grandparents Parenting Grandchildren and many others. Being involved with, and helping, these groups are among the things I find most satisfying about this job. It can be challenging at times sitting on various committees and steering groups, but it’s also enjoyable.
Three of my children are living in Orewa, and I have a daughter who makes natural health products who lives in Hastings. My husband is still running a cleaning business, but it’s more carpet cleaning and the like now. I first became a grandmother when I was only 36, and now have 15 grandchildren. Our first great grandchild arrived last year. My own children were all married before I became a celebrant, but I have been lucky enough to act as celebrant at the weddings of a few of my nieces and nephews. Next year I will be officiating at my grandson’s wedding, which is a pretty special opportunity.
I might retire in two or three years’ time, but I would like to stay long enough to see how Rodney Health Link evolves. Because the hospital boards have to consult with the public, they are relying on the Health Links more and more and our feedback is becoming increasingly important to them. I consider myself lucky that my own health is very good. Our family has always been keen on using natural remedies and products. I think the health system is becoming more attuned to natural alternatives. It’s already begun in areas such as healthy living, stop smoking campaigns and encouraging people to eat more healthily and exercise more.
I like to keep active physically and mentally. I walk and cycle regularly and love skiing. I had a hip replacement about five years ago, so now I have to ski carefully, but I still sneak away to Ruapehu for a few days whenever I can. Until last year we owned our own lodge at Rarimu. I took up skiing in my thirties when the children were teenagers. We joined the Downhill Ski Club and still belong – quite a few people in Whangaparaoa are in this club. We have a lodge at National Park and another high up on the mountain. I like being busy and think it also benefits my health and keeps me young. Otherwise I might turn into an older person – but hopefully that’s sometime off yet!
